Well douche your snatch and let's go!
I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Randomize
