that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Found the puke drawer
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
