Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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