PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
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I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
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it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.