He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
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