hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize