careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize