Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Randomize
