ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I thought I drunk dialed Adam last night and left him a voicemail. I just checked my phone. I realize I left a drunk voicemail with my son's teacher.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
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