I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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