I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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