Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
It's just like the Real World with babies
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
I'm having to shit out rocks
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
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