You just made me feel so damn special
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
