I'll bet she douches with gravy.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
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