So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
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