It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
Randomize
