omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize