you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
