i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Randomize
