I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
...so i touched it.
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Randomize
