We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
