okay pat passed out under dana's car
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize
