The sex toys I ordered are being shipped to my billing address instead of shipping address. Take a guess where they're on their way to right now - my parents' house. And the package has to be signed for so there's no way around it. Fuck.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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