Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Having a random hookup so left but love u
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Randomize
