areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
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