margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
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