elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
