do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
I got inside last night via doggy door
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
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