What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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