There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
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