Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
Randomize
