I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
