let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
