Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
Rock
Scissors
Fuck
So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
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I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
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I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
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