haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
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you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
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The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
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