Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Randomize