cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
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