He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize