I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
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