Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Randomize
