he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
