it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
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