I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
He has the fingertips of a God
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