I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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