I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
