I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
