he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
