but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Everyone says I win the strip club
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
Randomize
