Please don't use social media to get back at me.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
Randomize
