when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize