i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Randomize
