All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
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I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
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His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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